Prudence and Madness

A comfortable, upholstered armchair in a not so crowded coffee shop, a regular cup of Chai Tea Latte or a tall cup of Azuki frappuccino, an open notebook for writing, my favorite Parker pen (or even a cheap Uni Pinball sign pen would do), earphones plugged in, my mp3 player playing my coffee chillout playlist, and I’m all set to begin one of my favorite pasttimes — people watching.

It’s like looking in an aquarium and you observe how life goes on for everyone else. Or am I the one inside the aquarium, looking out to the world?

In my Coffee Universe, I both look inside myself, mull over things that has happened to me in the recent days and outside myself, looking without interfering at how people go about their lives.

In a way, observing how some people nurse their overpriced coffee and what kind of coffee certain groups of people prefer (for instance, fraps for younger people and hot espress0-based drinks for older folks but these are just hasty generalizations based on what I’ve observed) or who people usually stay with in a coffeeshop (boyfriend/girlfriend/bestfriend/mistress/boss?) is a learning experience, if not entertaining. After all, most Filipinos, whether they admit it or not, have a taste for checking out what other people are busy with.

For one, I observe that some women like meeting their wedding coordinators/planners in coffee shops. Maybe it’s cheaper to pay for coffee and tea-time food than to pay for a full meal or that it’s easier to talk over sounds of sipping and bursts of loud chatter rather than tinkling of spoons and forks on plates and people calling to the waiters for “bill!” In those times that I’m seated near these people, I tone down the volume of the mp3 player and listen to the wedding planner discuss schedules of future meetings, motifs, designs, themes and ask some personal details about the couple. Usually there are one or two coordinators and the lady engaged and her bestfriend . Weddings, perhaps, is a girl thing because seldom did I see a guy with his fiancee attending such meetings (an exception to that is our friend’s fiance who’s planning their wedding here because our friend is still working in Texas).

Another observation is that students make coffeeshops extensions of their libraries/study rooms/bedrooms. Those that I often see are medical, law, and nursing students, all of which, apparently, are studying for licensure exams (or for revalida, as in the case of UST medical students). If you frequent a coffee shop enough, you’d recognize the regulars and develop a kind of respect for their comfort corners. You tend to know who stays in which seat and for how long so you go find another seat which you know is free. I, for one, was guilty of this too, back in my med school and board review days. My favorite haunts back then were Starbucks at West Avenue near Saisaki/Kamayan, when I was reviewing for my revalida and Starbucks 6750 when I was reviewing for my medical board exam. You’d know who the students are because of the stack of books and the plates and empty cups on the table (because they stay there for 10 or more years that they have to eat lunch and dinner there. And sometimes breakfast too). If they don’t and decide to go out for meals, they might just lose their favorite space. Also they look annoyingly at those attention-seeking coffeeshop loafers who, with guffaws, want to let everyone know they’re in [insert favorite famous coffee shop here] and they can afford it, even if it meant sharing a cup of coffee or a plate of Belgian waffles with a friend.

But, of course, the loafers’ favorite argument against those studying nerds (ouch) is that the coffeeshop is not meant to be used as a library so silence is not the golden rule. And the studying nerds counter-argument to that is the coffeeshop isn’t for raucous behavior of those pretending to be cool either.

One very important rule of thumb when people watching: do not stare. Or rather, do not let the other person catch you staring. You might just freak them out, think that you’re a stalker or a serial killer (as some people are apt to do with hastily-drawn conclusions). While that I do not have a problem with people staring at me while I’m doing stuff, I think everyone will agree that it’s rather freaky to see someone who will continuously stare at EVERYTHING that you do. So, if you’re planning to go people watching, it’s better that you don’t linger on one person or group of persons for long. Look around you, observe what you can by mere passing your eyes over them, and then look at another. Listen but do not react to whatever it is you hear. Rather, just take it in and maybe write in your journal whatever it is you’re thinking about what you’ve seen and heard (an exercise and an excellent tool that I use at times in writing blog posts).

Observation is a first step to gathering such knowledge that you may not know just yet, but you can unobtrusively extract from other people. But, what you do with those observations are also important. See and learn.