Prudence and Madness

(see this posted in my dream blog: prudence, dreaming)

I dreamt of this several nights ago but wasn’t able to blog about it because of my “busy” schedule. Honestly, it slipped my mind. However, recent events made me remember…

But I cannot recall the specific details, as is common with most dreams. But what is still vivid was how Marius pulled me close to him and how soft and eager were his kisses. It made me think of cinnamon rolls. Then, we made love with a passion I never thought would be possible between us.

It was a dream I regret having to wake up from. And like with my other pleasant dreams (especially dreams that involve Marius), I wanted it to go on and on. Neverending. Forever. Because I know, in the real world, it would just never happen.

Or perhaps I could get a taste of it?

The unholy hours of Sunday gave that to me. Amidst half-empty beer cans, liquor bottles, plates, ashtrays filled with smoke and ash, soft yellow lights almost engulfed by the thick darkness and the incessant cajoling of the intoxicated, the Dream broke into the real world.

The softness, the wetness, the seemingly playful touches. The Cinnamon Kiss. The kiss that I’ve waited for so long…
And then, it’s gone. Vanished back to Dreamland.

But do I really want it to come back, knowing only I appreciate its significance? When only I give meaning to it? Do I want to make it happen again, even if, in my heart, I know it’s only I who wants it? Or would I rather let the dream stay in the confines of my fantasies, protected by my little gargoyle?

Perhaps, it would be better if I never get to have that Cinnamon Kiss from Marius again. A kiss that only meant something for me but not to him shouldn’t ever happen again.

My little gargoyle, don’t let the dream out, until the Inevitable comes. Or if Marius, in his heart, called for it. Don’t fail me. For my own battered heart’s sake, bury the dream in forgetfulness…