Don’t you just hate it that, when you are a spinster (or a bachelor), you seem utterly surrounded by sweet, mushy couples, holding hands, kissing, or just plain embracing, and you are reminded your past relationships, wondering what you did wrong? And when you are involved in a relationship, it would seem that you are surrounded from all sides by single people, threatening to snatch your loved one away from you? Does it sometimes feel that the Powers that Be up there aren’t just too happy seeing you all so comfortable in life, problem-free for 3 seconds or less, that they’d think of someway fast to just dampen your day? Darn, this life sucks. Sometimes I feel my purpose of my existence on this Earth is to make the beautiful, carefree people of the world feel lucky. Should I feel proud of that? Should it be any consolation that without a person like me, all those beautiful, carefree people would be just average Joes and Janes? Maybe the Powers that Be are laughing out there right now because of the misery I’m in. I’ll bet they’re cooking up new ways to ruin my life. And, of course, I wouldn’t be able to do anything about that. They’ve got the Powers! But what I can do is make it as drab as I possibly can. I won’t let them be so entertained because of me. So tomorrow I’ll sleep the whole day and night or do nothing really worthy. I’ll numb myself. Yes, there were nights full of tears. But every teardrop I shed will just bring smiles to their smug faces.
I’ll be numb. I’ll make myself brain dead. I will not love anymore.
